10 Things not to say/do when visiting someone in the hospital

Hospitals are not such a good place to be in, and recently I had to bear a week in a hospital due to Typhoid. Obviously people who love you and care for you, get worried; but there are some things which you should never say to a sick person in a hospital. Here is a list-

Dear Lord, Save Me!

1. What have you done? (Yeh kya kar liya?)

Guys please; no one wants to be sick. When someone says this, you really want to reply,”Yeah I saw a bottle with a note: ‘This will make you sick’ and I drank all the contents of it deliberately”

2. What are the doctors saying?

The people, who visit, want to know all about the medical procedure step by step. Dear People, lying at that bed in the hospital is horrifying in itself; the patient gets even more scared when he/she has to repeat the ordeal all over again. Yes you can inquire about the progress but in a subtle way.

3. How did this happen?

Yes, one of the things that suck big time is when you have to repeat about your sickness/mishap again and again.

4. How are you feeling? (kaisi tabiyat hai?)

I do not know anyone who has replied in an honest and negative way to this question, despite feeling treble. You only say “fine” or “better” to this. This is a staple question even in a normal question. Try to be considerate.

5. Let me know if you need anything.

Yes, this is a standard phrase used by people. I am not saying that people lie about lending a helping hand; but if you really want to help anyone, don’t just say it, do something. You can- Offer your time as attendant so that the family/friends can have some relief; bring coffee/tea/snacks; get medicines; offer a ride to back home to attendant; get blankets/food for attendant; bring books to read; music to listen etc.

6. You must be getting bored here.

No, not at all! Don’t you know the hospital holds an entertainment program every hour? Yes the patient does feel bored at times. You may like to help in ending that boredom. You can bring books to read; music to listen; games to play; try to lighten up the mood of a patient etc.

7. I don’t know what to say!

Alright not all people get it what to say when visiting a patient in the hospital. To be honest, even the patient doesn’t know how to react to the people visiting him/her. But don’t be too direct! Please try to be a little positive in your conversations; it brings hope to the patient.

8. Sleep now, take proper rest, and do not roam here and there!

Yes the sleep. Sleeping in the hospital environment is not that easy as it seems. The doctors and nurses keep on visiting you for rounds; sometimes you are in pain; some patients are on strict bed rest; restricted sleep posture (the Intra-veins causes swelling) and hell lot of other reasons. Even if you want, you cannot roam. So when the people say this, it is actually like rubbing chilies on your wounds!

9. Seeing your long lost friends/relatives after a decade, whoop right next to you in the hospital.

The fake sympathizers, and the people who enjoy seeing you suffer, Uff! These people should be shooed away immediately. I suggest the hospitals to develop an emergency button for this purpose as well! It gets even worse, when they actually wake you up to “see you”! urgh :X And they say, “I heard about you and came running to see you” as if I got admitted into the hospital only to see you running!

10. Cry and be emotional! (Hayee, mera baccha!)

The last thing any patient wants to deal with is the crying! I am not saying that it’s wrong to be worried about the patient, but don’t cry! Trust me on this, it’s hard to be there in that situation, the patient itself is scared and feels low, your crying just demoralizes the patient.

 

Irritated, but just can not do anything!

When visiting someone in the hospital, try to limit your queries, and try to be hopeful and positive. Understand that it is difficult to be there in that situation, do not increase their worries to attend you, and instead do something to ease their burden.

Leave a comment if you feel some other pet dialog(s), I left in this list.

Why me?

A very warm greetings to the people living in the 21st century, located in India’s capital city, Delhi!

A city which has the VIPs, VVIPs and god knows how many Vs…???

A city of power, where so much security is provided to the “important” that the commons are forgotten!

A city where maybe thousands are employed to provide protection, but still a girl cannot go out of her house without fear!

Time: 6:00 pm
Location: Road just behind my house

My mom was cooking some delicacy and found some ingredients missing, she asked me to bring it from the nearby grocery store. Following her instructions, of course it’s just the evening time and I do not have to travel far, so it seems really simple.

I went out, just on the way back home, mind it it’s a busy road, just behind my house; I have walked that path zillion times!

Two guys on a motorcycle crossed me and threw something on my back, surprised, and a little shocked I looked up and abused them about driving in a proper way! Then my eyes fell on the thing that they threw on me, this bought me more into a state of embarrassment mixed with anger.

It was a packet of condoms!

That very moment I wanted to hold those rascals’ collar and give them a tight slap each, but the only problem- they were gone!

Since people can point out about me being dressed inappropriately, so to clear the doubt, I was wearing a plain kurta and salwar, covering me properly!

This is a very common culture in the life of a girl, incidents of eve teasing happen just every day, in places expected like buses, metro, road and even in the places unexpected!

Some report these and as a result they have to face a bigger amount of trouble in going in and out of the police stations at odd times!

A friend once reported a drunken guy passing lewd comments to her, to the police, our so-called “Women helpline”, to our surprise the attitude of the officers was somewhat like this while registering the complaint- “Madam ko cheed diya hai, gussa ho gai!” (Madam has been teased and she is angry).

Standing there in the police station with my friend, I sensed that an eve-teasing matter holds no relevance to them!
Since we had enough proof, so the police traced the vehicle, for which I appreciate their efforts. But then another issue in hand was the identity disclosure, when a guy can tease a girl in broad day light, he can also create troubles for her if he comes to know her whereabouts. Of course, the big chunks of male ego, “How could a girl complain about me?”

The only way to avoid the identity disclosure was to ask the accused for an apology, in written and we had to except it otherwise the case will go to court and which clearly means inviting trouble!

The only question in my mind while writing this is, why can’t I roam around freely wherever I want, at any time of the day?

What is my crime, that I have to go through such kind of harassment? A man can never understand that feeling of being touched forcefully without your consent, of hearing a lewd comment about yourself, that helplessness when someone is stalking you, that anger when you want to protest but you do not to avoid a bad scene!

Is it my fault being a girl?

Most girls do not even mention these incidents to their family because that will create a stress in the members. (Girls are already a burden in India!)

Why can’t our society grow up and in each case not put the blame of protection of the girl on the girl itself? We can teach our sons to respect women, to behave properly with girls.

Maybe then a girl in can go out of her house with this comfort that she will be safe till the time she is back in her house. Maybe then our society will be just, and safe for all!

Unusual yet Inspiring auto ride!

It was a usual day, one of my daily struggles to hire an auto rickshaw to reach my college, which is by the way a big hassle in a place like Delhi. But today was different, after getting frustrated with auto drivers charging almost double the price, I found myself lucky to find an auto driver ready to go by the meter!

The driver was somewhere in his late 40’s and wore the uniform (which was again a surprise!), as the journey began we (driver and me with two other friends) started interacting.
He started off by saying, “Khoob maan laga kar padhna madam ji agar fail bhi ho jao to ghabrana mat, khush hona” (Study hard, ma’am, even if you fail, don’t worry)
By now I have gone used to advices but it was the first time someone was telling me not to worry, even if I fail! This made me curious to know, what makes him say that.

He clarifies his point further, “Main 8 rickshaw chalata hun, ijjat ki khata hun aur aapne sapne bhi pura karta hun, aur ye sab iss liye ho paya kyuki main 8th class mein fail ho gaya tha…” (I run 8 rickshaws, earn my money with dignity, fulfill my dreams, and all this is possible only because I got fail in class 8th).

According to him, when a person fails, he comes up with excellent ways to cover that flaw into him/her. With a proud smile he told us that he dreamt of marrying his daughter to a high profile officer, and did so! Enthusiastically he revealed, “laal batti wali gaddi mere ghar tak aati hai” Government distinguished cars stops at my home now (‘laal batti ki gaddi’, which is a huge craze among Indians :P) He credits it all to his failures.

Addressing us as ‘beti’ (daughter) he hesitatingly suggested, “work for 10 years and keep a business plan in mind, implement it, and see the wonder”, by now I had started liking this man’s practical sense.

 

 

 

 

It’s very true and rational to say that money is all that is required to prosper in this world. Oscar Wilde once said, When I was young I thought that money was the most important thing in life; now that I am old I know that it is…

We were stuck in an irritating traffic jam (very common in Delhi 😐 ) when he said the most important 3 pointers for life. He said, “In life all that matters is a passion, always have passion for 3 things in life.

  • Fine clothes- first impression is the last!
  • Quality food- shows that you belong to a well to do family.
  • Money- because the world runs with it!

(I was happy to listen these three points, mostly because I figured two items from this list is a tick mark in my case! ;))

Just when we were about to reach the destination, he disclosed something far more interesting than any of it above. He said that he is desperately waiting for his only son to get failed!
I was left in a state of shock, because never in my life I had seen any parent wanting their child to get failed in academics! (It is a grand affair in India, where education is so stressed upon)
He dreams of making his son a millionaire! And truly I prayed for his dream to come true.

Just as I paid him the fare, he left us with blessings and last thought from his heart. “Never cheat in life, be true to yourself and the world”.

Had I been impatient I would have not tried to listen to the driver, I never do! But there was something amazing about this person that made me sit through and give it a thought.

Later into the boring lecture I pondered upon the morning ride, and I smiled at the mere irony. There have been people close to me, saying all this, but I guess there is always a right time for everything.

I don’t know that person’s name, but from the bottom of my heart I would like to thank him, and also wish him good luck!

One thing that I learnt from this is that — You find hope in the most hopeless places.

(The next time when you, hire an auto, just hope for the hopeful! :D)

FYI- Its Maggi

Are you among those who are obsessed about maggi? Or you are not amongst them?

Whatever maybe be the condition, you must visit here! and witness how a household product maggi can be transformed into innovative and delicious manner!

This place is named – FYI its Maggi, situated at Bunglow Road, Delhi. Its just by the lane of Adidas showroom.

It is a maggi lounge, a place to chill,  spend time with your friends and treat your taste buds with something as great as ‘maggi’! FYI has given a whole new way of thinking about maggi, it has added a new flavor to it!

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I always wanted my maggi to be cheesy, and I got it here! 😀 I was literally drooling over the food as it arrived! One can choose from various options available on the menu. But you will also notice the exciting names given to the dishes. All the dishes are named after generally used slangs by youngsters, like- BRB, HNK, LOL and so on…

The food is available for as low as Rs 25 to highest Rs 65. One thing that you cannot miss about here is the presence of college students ( thanks to its close proximity to DU’s KMC).

So the next time you get that maggi craving, you must go to this place, and do justice to your craving! 🙂

Also, see the menu picture. Enjoy!

A place for your soul: Indian Coffee House

Life needs not to be on an accelerator always!

Sometimes living life slowly is good. Its gives you time to think.

In this preoccupied and busy life, I made a stop at Indian Coffee House, second floor, at Baba Kharag Singh Marg, Connaught Place, Delhi.

There is something about this place. Different and very calm air blows here. There is a little easiness and comfort always here.

Lately, I have started coming here very often. The regular people and waiters know me now!

It does not have an extended or fancy menu and the food is not very much to the standards of many fast food chains available. But you can any day – any time stop here for little snacks and coffee.

The best thing here is that you can sit here as long as you wish. No one bothers or disturbs!

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An amazing contrasting view can be witnessed here. Right in front of me is a bid peepal tree. On my left is a combination of some old and new buildings. The cool breeze also brings the honking of car horns below.

Waiters here are very hardworking and generous. They greet you with warmth and right now I can also see one of them offering leftover Biriyani to birds.

On most days you can find monkeys playing on the peepal tree and squirrels running around the open space!

Like I said, there is something about this place which accepts everyone. I can see a group of aged people on a table, laughing and cracking jokes; a group of office goers discussing some project; some young college students probably discussing their ‘fest’.

There may be no fancy menu, decorative table or chairs, but this place is surely a place to be! This is a place for finding some peace for your soul in this busy city!